Dream Weaver...

When I read Jenny McCarthy's book I couldn't help but think she was a little crazy.  Mind you this was about a month or two ago.  Especially her section on dreams.  She talked about how vivid they would become and told of one dream in particular that was recurring.  She use to dream that she would cut her baby out of her belly at night and play with it.  Then quickly put it back in when she thought she would get caught.  She talked about looking forward to that dream.  

WHAT?  

I thought she was reading too many Steven King novels or ate some really bad Bill Cosby sandwiches every night (remember on his show whenever he would make his "special" sandwich he would have crazy dreams like he was wearing an LSD sweater?... no wait that was real).  

Anyway, I'm having those dreams.  I would like them to stop.  I think the part that is so different is I remember EVERYTHING that happens.  I liked the good ol' days when you would wake up after a weird, twisted dream and remember it was horrible...just not exactly why.  The other night I dreamt of the very large Peanut icon of Planters with the top hat and cane.  Yea, but it was evil and chasing me.  There are always knives involved in my nightmares... what's up with that?  I think pregnant women should write books about their dreams and I guarantee they would sell more than Steven King b/c in their dreams the clowns wouldn't just hang out in toilets, but in cans of Planter's Peanuts!  

PS.  Okay, I do have the "good" kind of dreams too but I can't go in detail about those.

15 Weeks and I Saw the BABY!

I went to my appt today thinking it would be routine.  They dip the fun stick in my urine and test it for diabetes, they take my blood pressure and tell me numbers I don't understand, I give some blood which will be use for tests I pretend to understand, and lastly they ask me about myself which is my favorite part.  Someone actually wants to really hear about all my pregnancy baggage because it's important and not because they are expected to as a friend or family member.  

Well today I got a surprise and got to actually see the baby!  I wasn't thinking that would not happen for another month.  My mom went with me too which was even more fun because she got all excited like only grandmas can!  Plus she asked all the important questions!  The doctor tried to just hear the heartbeat, but couldn't find it b/c the baby was moving around so much.  I was confused at first b/c she said "Where's that heartbeat..." but followed up with laughing... So I assumed the laughing was b/c the baby was being a little stinker, not b/c it didn't have a heartbeat.  But from previous blogs you can see where my mind began to wonder....

She pulled out the ultrasound just to make sure and sure enough, there IS a little human in there with a head and eyes and arms and legs!  Of course I teared up and the best part was as she was pointing out the eye, we saw the arm extend out like it was punching back at the ultrasound wand.  I have a feeling it's a boy, no reason just when I saw it I immediately thought BOY.  

Sorry I rambled so much about this, but it is the first time I saw the baby....I'm soooo excited.  It makes all the sickness and misery worth it!  Just me and the little human hanging out all day!  Made me think again about all those lattes I still drink!  

Total Meltdown.. Welcome Horomones

The Happy Times!

Yes, I'm at the "bitchy" stage where life is hard and I need to cry about it for three hours b/c one hour is NOT enough time to hate yourself.  I'm fat, ugly, boring, and convinced my husband doesn't love me and sometimes I suspect the dogs too. I'm so irrational at times that I even get mad at the baby because what has it done for me. Nothing!  Sounds horrible doesn't it?  Yea, pregnancy is full of fun surprises like self loathing.

Then I checked my email today and found my weekly baby update, week 14.  I read that my baby is three inches long, if it's a girl it has 2 million eggs (poor thing), and it has it's own set of fingerprints. FINGERPRINTS.  That was like my "Juno fingernail" moment (won't get it if you haven't seen the movie).  Okay, it has a true unique identity now.  Something that no one can replicate unless they are in a 007 movie.  Man 007 is HOT (side note).  Also several of my girlfriends had their babies this week and they are adorable.  Welcome to the world Caden and Leah!  Then I watched baby Chase roll over on his momma's blog and I can't believe how cute he is.  And of course every time I see my niece Natalie I love her more and more.  

So in perspective, I guess this is just another one of those things that all moms go through and my job is just to remember that when I'm crying, mad, and have the urge to call all my girlfriends and tell them men are worthless and why do we get married... I just need to repeat the word FINGERPRINTS!  

PS.  Men are not worthless and can be very helpful (read Nick's comments) and I love you Matt just in case you read this blog... remember it's the belly talking and not me.  

Belly at Three Months...

Here it is... the beginning of the belly.  

I tried to have Matt take a picture of it with my new fancy camera, but he took several shots of my chest instead so I just gave up.  I've noticed at school now the kids give me the up and down looking for the bump.  I'm "Bump Watch 09".  I can't wait till it's just out there and obvious where kids are more repulsed by it then curious.  Just like all you momma experts told me, once I hit the end to my three months on Monday I immediately started feeling better.  I forgot how wonderful life is when you don't feel nausea all the time and have energy to do the dishes or at least put your dishes in the sink. 

Last time I appreciated health like this was when I had mono my senior year and brushing my teeth was like running a marathon.  I remember thinking "When I'm healthy again, I will never take it for granted."  And then of course there's college when you purposely inflicted poor health upon yourself... not me... that's what other people have told me mom, like Ann it was all Ann... Ann and her Thursday night $3.00 pitchers at Shannigans.  

Heartbeat at 160!

Doctor's appt went well, the heartbeat was heard and it sounded super fast.  The doctor said it was 160 beats per minute.  I started the blood work to make sure it is "normal".  Still don't know if I like doing those tests or not.  Matt is in favor, but part of me doesn't want to know and doesn't care.  I know I will love it no matter what, but I can see wanting to be prepared.  Anyway next appt is April 6th and the BIG ultrasound May 5th to find out the sex.

Matt kept asking me what I want, boy or girl.  I told him I really just don't care.  I can see the positives in both and the headache in both.  He then told me he wants a girl.... awww..... talk about melting my heart.  If we do have a girl, I will make sure and show him this post when she is 14 and CRAZY! 

PS. Belly picture to come soon....

Three Months...

Tomorrow is the doctor's appt where we get to hear the heart beat and it marks the end of three months (I think... or 11 weeks).  I know, I should know exactly how many weeks I am.  I get confused sometimes and I think I can blame that on being pregnant!  This last weekend I went to LaPine for a girls' weekend.  We did a lot of great stuff like reading, watching movies, eating, and we played Wii Fit.  According to Wii I have lost 10 pounds in the last month or so.  First of all I would beg to differ and I think Wii might be trying to make me feel better.  Yet, if this is true I stayed up one night trying to figure out exactly where I could've lost it?  I mean I KNOW I didn't lose it in my belly.  I KNOW I didn't lose it in my rear and I KNOW I didn't lose in my chest (even though I wish I did).  So I'm thinking either I have one hamstring missing that I haven't noticed or I lost half my brain.  I decided that was it.  I have heard that pregnant women get stupider as the months go on.  I can only imagine that person is now living in a cave somewhere in Nevada hiding from all pregnant women.  I embrace my loss of brain mass and see it as a great opportunity to say and do whatever I want without remorse or repercussions! Like getting mad at my students for daring to ask me a question when I obviously just want to blog about myself.  The nerve!  

Anyway tomorrow I will post some pics if we get to see the little peanut.

So this was my parents when they were mid 20's.  My dad's hair style has never NEVER changed.  Love the dress and shoes mom.  I think those would totally be in style today!  Just thought I would follow up the 40th anniversary post with a picture.  

In the 10th week and starting to feel pregnant appearance wise.  I woke up on Saturday morning and discovered my belly button was sticking out more than usual.  That's much more exciting than feeling sick.  I feel like I'm starting to "show", but of course Matt says he can't tell.  I'm not sure if that is because he is denial or because he thinks he's suppose to say that.  Someone has to explain to him that when my belly button pops inside out he can't tell me he thinks I look the same anymore.  I will really really hurt him.  

So stretchy pants were the best invention ever made.  Of course I stood by that philosophy even before pregnancy.  I never understood why we all don't show up for Thanksgiving dinner in stretchy pants and tshirts (okay I actually do).  Why do we dress up only to feel fat, bloated, and lay on the couch the rest of the day? Thanksgiving is like our free glimpse into a pregnant woman's life.  We show up hungry, then want to throw-up, feel fat, and decide anything tight around our waist was a really bad idea! But we always find room for pie.